The Kobold Song/words

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Nothing unusual about that day
Some folk at work and some at play
Though it certainly didn’t end that way
When the kobolds came to town.


I don’t know who spotted them first
They sorta came in a giant burst
But folks just chuckled “This isn’t the worst!”
When the kobolds came to town.


Swinging away with all their might
Mongrel kobolds put up a fight
Time to clear the town of this crazy blight
Of kobolds that came to town


But what they were swinging caught the eye
“Ale abuse!” went up the cry!
“Today these critters are going to die!”
Those kobolds that came to town


Seems the kobolds were making quite merry
Swinging those bottles of Winterberry
Still, all in all, they weren’t very scary
Mongrel kobolds that came to town


They’d take a swig then swing away
These mongrel kobolds couldn’t stay
We’d have to clear them from the way
Nasty kobolds that came to town


So one by one we took them out
Some by sword and some by shout
And saved the Ale for the end of the bout
With the kobolds that wandered the town


What happened next caused much dismay
The bottles were fragile and crumbled away
And many folk were heard to say…
Blast those kobolds that came to town

Shoddy workmanship caused much distress
And broken glass made quite a mess
But where the Ale’d come from was anyone’s guess
Did the kobolds find it in town?


Suspicious thoughts ran wild and free
More kobolds joined in the melee
“Save one to talk!” was the decree
Of the kobolds that came to town


Drunken kobolds wandered the town
Drinking the Ale we couldn’t down
All we now could do was frown
At the kobolds that came to town


Bribery and negotiation
Cannot change the situation
It’s only leading to frustration!
At the kobolds that came to town


Then one of the kobolds did start to speak
And his words were rather bleak
It made those listening want to shriek
At thieving kobolds in our town


“We have crates of this stuff. It good” said he
“We need more…” Well it’s not going to be!
We don’t share our Winterberry
Not with kobolds who raid the town


Interrogations then began
To find their Ale was our plan
But then that kobold made his stand
On why the kobolds came to town


“Now we take your ale and leave”
Such boldness we could not believe
What trick could he have up his sleeve?
That kobold in our town


So while we all stand there arguing
“Take it all home!” from that kobold rings
Is it possible we heard such a thing?
Bold kobold in our town


Wait just a minute.. They wouldn’t try…
The cry went up “To the Stone Eye”
“Defend the Ale!” was our cry.
From the kobolds that came to town


With fear we hurry on our way
Race to the bar with no delay
They surely cannot get away
The kobolds that came to town


At the bar, we ask Byron “How’s the Ale?”
That mongrel kobold looks rather pale
Replies “They took it all!” and begins to wail
Horrible kobolds that came to town


In disbelief we drop our jaws
His answer gives us all a pause
All our Ale is in the claws
Of the kobolds that came to town?


If kobolds want Ale they should have to pay
But Byron, that coward, got out of the way
He’s really not popular at all today
Except with the kobolds that raided the town


A raiding party quickly forms
As some at Byron yell and storm
“How could you!” “Is this the norm?”
Traitor kobold in our town


We travel to the mongrels home
And the hallways thoroughly comb
Looking for kobolds who possibly roam
The drunk kobolds that came from our town


Empty-handed we return
There wasn’t much that we did learn
We return with great concern
Are the kobolds still in town?


Much discussion then ensues
About what happened to the booze
But we are greeted with the news
That kobold is back in town


He’s back in town to tease and taunt
And for us his antics flaunt
But our ale is what we want
From that kobold in our town


We beg and plead to no avail
Then we rant and rave and rail
At that kobold who laughs and heads down the trail
That kobold who came to our town


Back to the Eye and Byron and questions
Hopefully he has some suggestions
Maybe a place those kobolds did mention
The kobolds that came to town


At least there’s still some ale to buy
Though that keg on tap will soon go dry
It is the last of our ale supply
Thanks to kobolds who raided the town


The whole town goes on a buying spree
Stocking up on winterberry
And complaining drunkenly
About the kobolds that came to town


Then the last of the ale has finally sold
One wonders what horrors will now unfold
The Rest gone dry should be a sight to behold
Shame on the kobolds who came to town


Byron says with much chagrin
“Nine days ‘til the next shipments in”
He shoud’na let those kobolds win
The kobolds who came to town


Nine days! Let’s hope he cannot count
Please! Someone an expedition mount
To bring Ale.. and kobolds to account
Those kobolds who came to town


Nine days! How can we e’re survive
No one will be left alive!
Through soberness we’ll have to strive
Because kobolds came to town!


So beware my friends if you should see
A kobold enter merrily
Give heed and listen to my plea…
Keep kobolds from coming to town!