Leafiara (prime)/Tales/A Letter Forever Undelivered

Original Story: Eoantos 16, 5116

Timeline

This happens after Talador but before the black blood cure.

A Letter Forever Undelivered

Leafiara's shoulders slumped and she let out a sigh as she reviewed the unfinished letter before her.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

To those who slew enthralled children in Talador:

Some view events and actions in this world only as objectives and obstacles--they're called utilitarians, if I remember my mom's lessons correctly. Others like myself deal in the domain of good and evil.

Purity and sin are composed of intentionality.

Before I understood that some of the Landing's own citizens were enthralled, I struck several of them down in the streets. In my life as a whole I'm no perfect innocent, but I'm not haunted at all by what I did to them. In that one regard I hold myself [a crossed-out word] without blame. Because I believed they had their own wills, I thought sincerely that there was no other option. So, when it comes to Talador...

I'm not like the Mayor, who was so hung up on Larsya's further aging even though we traveled the safest path that we could come up with.

I'm not like Hap, who saw Drangell and Chaston dead and so hasn't blinked an eye over the corpses of children.

I'm not even like Ephya or Stormy, who were so repulsed and found it difficult to watch.

I was less disturbed by what I saw than by what I didn't and couldn't see: your motivations. Were they pure or were they sin? Fear or glee? A sense of necessity or thrill?

It's a blessing that I can't read minds.

You struck down children without hesitation--and if you'd like to keep my respect and love, then never tell me why you did it. Unless I hear otherwise, I'll assume you thought there was no other choice. You have that courtesy because I'd want it for myself. That's why I'm telling you what I've done, even if you didn't see it firsthand, so that we can be "even."

But allow me to warn you...

If something like this happens again, I won't allow anyone the blessing of ambiguous intention. I will expose evil if it's there, at all costs, even up to my own death. Thanks to the Ebon Gate festival, I

[the letter ends abruptly]

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Leafi shook her head.

If I give them this letter, they're probably the types who will me why they did it even though--or even just because--I say not to... and I can never know the truth. Lylia was honest already, but I know Lylia--I'm not worried. It's the others. So often so thoughtless.

She let out a long, slow breath, then picked up her letter and slipped a small bottle from her desk into her pocket. She left the inn and took a walk: outside the north gate, up the merchant road, and along the coastal cliffs before stopping at a high point.

The sea breeze brushed over her arms and legs and whipped her short red hair into her face. She thought to herself for a moment that she'd have to come here again some time. She'd already told friends she needed a new look soon: that she'd grow her hair out after all this was over and after the black veins were gone. How would longer hair feel in this breeze?

Leafi released her grip on the letter, and before it could fly away she flung a weak Fire Spirit spell at it and let the ashes scatter. She nodded slowly and quietly, satisfied.

Rubi's right. The situation's not so severe yet...

I hope.

Looking Back - From Ivastaen 17, 5118

I like how I remember that the small bottle was an important detail that I left open to be followed up on, but have absolutely no idea what it contained. I know it wasn't alcohol since Leafi doesn't drink, though!

I had to think pretty hard too before I remembered where she was going in the letter while talking about Ebon Gate, which she didn't even attend. At the time she had concern over whether Raznel might take control of her one day, but since Leafi still needed to be able to save lives, she didn't want to follow Hapenlok's idea of burning out his nerves so that the witch couldn't use his magic.

So instead she asked for someone to deliver her a pair of manacles from EG, which she'd end up taking to a merchant to line with silk and cut the chain. The idea was that she would wear comfortably and then even if she did fall under Raznel's control, it would be easy enough to restrain her by tying the dangling chains together. If someone's move was to kill her right away in an act of violence, she'd be "exposing evil" and clearing up "ambiguous intention" at the cost of her own death.

...but I think this is way, way too minute a detail for people to remember and RP out on the spot, so I dropped it. :P