Ooo, My Name is Charna (poetry)
Title: Ooo, My Name is Charna
Author: player of Charna Ja'Varrel'Kav
It was a bright bonny day out on Solhaven bay
When my eye’s light started to fade
My feet had strayed I should have home stayed
Or at least should've carried a blade!
Wait now!
Let me go back, to the top of this track,
So you can see the scenario clear.
I beg you to please hold, ‘til my tale is all told,
Your laughter, snicker or sneer.
Chorus
Ooo my name is Charna, It's nothing to hurrah,
To boast, gloat, or cheer.
Just a simple lass, With very little class,
And certainly, nothing to fear.
I have this other name, You may find it lame,
In the City, it is sort of a joke.
Town Corpse of Haven, I'm anything but craven,
Yes, often I fall and then croak.
End Chorus
On this fine bright day, while roaming the bay,
I had taken to playing in the sands.
I was searching for fruit, On a sinuous route,
While probing with two open hands.
Oh now,
You see what is coming, although I'm still humming.
As off through the marshes, I tread.
I took to knee in the muck and that ended my luck,
As that Shelfae claimed my poor head.
Once I paid for my death, And drew on my breath,
I decided to head for the cave.
I was looking for moss, but the Cyclops was boss.
And he wasn't inclined to behave.
CHORUS
Back in the town’s quaint stable, they wished my fate a fable-
And stuck me at an Inn table-
With that sweet old lady Mabel! Who said to me, “If you are able-
Grab hold this thing's not quite stable!"
Yea right.
To the lagoon, I was bound, while she made that “tsking” sound.
"I'll bring you an orange,” I cried.
But one sniff of buggy gases turns your world to molasses,
I bet she sighed when I died.
Sound advice I was given but by now I was driven.
So once I could move to a stand.
I set out for the west road, back in that foraging mode,
As it was grapes I now had planned.
This meant to the trolls, I could handle those souls,
If I'd had my shield in hand.
They hit me.
I admit rather sweetly, I folded quite neatly.
And soon I was dragged over-sand.
CHORUS
Are you counting my set? Did you all take a bet?
How many deeds did I use that day?
I'm now up to three and I have to ask to thee,
Was I unlucky, dumb, or fey?
The Gleeman gave me some tips and had a plan on his lips
“I'll take you to hunt pesky Shan."
But the Purple Mage to me said, "Careful, this you will soon dread.
I'd run far away if you can."
But I didn't have far to toil, as the Gleeman's magic recoiled,
It was a one in a million shot!
That blew out my neck and I yelled, "What the heck?"
And the Sea Mage laughed... well, a lot.
CHORUS
I decided to sulk in Market, yes, my rear was going to park it.
Just on this innocent bench.
I was given a terrible fright by the locksmith just to my right-
When his box emitted a stench.
It was a dazzling explosion, and I came to a conclusion,
Since I was the only one to die,
That my toll was growing too steep, so I trundled off to sleep,
But on the way, things went awry.
Oh yes!
I had made it to the pawnshop, The Krolvin me gave a good chop,
Neatly taking off my head!
Great! An Invasion had struck, Yea, it was just more dumb luck.
But I swear I was going to bed!
Chorus
The deaths all were now ended, my body was now mended,
And off to bed, I would fly.
But on the net, I heard them cry, "Charna, come now, don't be shy!"
“Come we promise you won’t die!”
The night ended in tales, some as big as the whales,
Given to a sweet gypsy maid.
When the tales had ended, she thought us most splendid,
And offered us bits of trade.
When she finally up came to me, I gazed on apprehensively-
She offered a blade that was blessed.
Fearing it might up and explode, or even turn me into a toad!
I declined, looking quite distressed!
"Now come on my dear, you have nothing to fear.
And gifts are nothing to be ashamed."
I smiled at her politely. I must’ve looked unsightly!
She then asked, "What are you named?"
You all know my answer, sing with me now!
Chorus