No one is quite sure where Starchitin Elfpeer comes from. He claims to have come from a gnomish settlement located in the Karazja Jungle. Though no one else has been able to confirm the existence of such a settlement, the well known ability of gnomes to conceal their homes means it is possible he's telling the truth.
What is known Starchitin, often referred to as Star or Starchy by others, arrived with a bang in the Town of River's Rest towards the end of the year 5103 when many other forest gnomes suddenly left their homes in the wilds to enter civilization. His main reason for moving into the great town of River's Rest is, apparently, to annoy its inhabitants into an early grave.
Despite his abrasive and often crude, maddening, and/or repulsive demeanor, Starchitin has managed to rack up an impressive list of accomplishments in town. Among them, as he will proudly boast to others, he is the first gnome to enter River's Rest, the first gnome to gain citizenship in River's rest, the first gnome to join Beacon Hall Archives, and the first gnome to join the Order of Lorekeepers.
In addition to his many firsts, Starchitin has used the natural talent all gnomes have with tinkering to become an excellent locksmith and a superb archer. Often heard bragging that there's no box in the Rest that he cannot pick and that any creature can be killed by simply "pokin them in the eye".
He has also helped defend the town against invading forces on several occasions. Most recently wielding his bow against Grevisth's forces and his limericks against Grevisth himself, whom Starchitin continues to insist is not, and never was, a gnome (even going so far as to refer to him as "the wanna-be"). Maintaining the stance that gnomes have no need to take over River's Rest because, in his mind at least, the Rest is already secretly run by gnomes.
Methods of Annoyance
As with any who are the first of their kind to enter an area, Starchitin has been a major influence in how others in River's Rest view gnomes. Their thoughts often turning to disgust, revulsion, and dread on the mere mention of the race. A reaction that he often revels in.
Having developed many effective tools in his arsenal of annoyance, the most commonly seen ones are:
- hiding in the shadows and imitating others to put them in embarrassing positions
- an extensive and ever growing collection of poorly written limericks about various residents in River's Rest
- kissing, licking, and/or drooling on those he knows will not appreciate it
- peeing on boots (most often used when the tables are turned and folk start annoying him)
- Citizen of River's Rest
- Member of Beacon Hall Archives
- Follower of Aeia
- Former Lorekeeper
- Member of the Rogue Guild
- High Lord
- Master Locksmith
- Master Fletcher
- Wanna-be Banisher
Little Known Facts
Starchitin is an excellent auctioneer, once having helped BHA raise an impressive sum at a benefit of theirs.
While he has a reputation as a pickpocket, Starchitin has only rarely indulged in such activities when it did not further his aims of annoying others. Rarely does he keep what he gains from such practices, the rightful owner getting their item back once they're been sufficiently annoyed.
Starchitin has worked to improve the town of River's Rest many times, the most notable being when he dragged a discarded crate from behind Byron's establishment to the Commons and decorating it for those to leave herbs in for the benefit of others. However, the altruism should not be considered without some self interest, as it provides smaller races a useful place to sleep behind.
Due to his maddening nature, the flinger was originally conceived as a means hurl him clear to the mainland. The idea, understandably, took off with the little gnome even claiming to be in the process of building one for several years (towards what end is not known) and several players using their golden pickle requests to attempt to get the flinger added to the game. Whether the flinger that exists just outside town today was built by the gnome, another citizen, or by someone else entirely is up for debate.
His last name has nothing to do with any perceived kinship with elves, any who even casually observe him can attest that he has little tolerance for them or their undeserved (in his mind) haughtiness. Rather, it is a reference to his habit of peeing on the boots of elves (or most any non-gnome) that he feels is too full of themself.
You see Starchitin Elfpeer the Master Locksmith.
He appears to be a Forest Gnome of the Angstholm Bloodline.
He is diminutive. He appears to be in the spring of life. He has piercing purple eyes and alabaster skin. He has raggedly cut, tousled blonde hair. He has a broad chest. He has a small opaque spider on his head.
He has a tinkering gnome tattoo on his wrist, a small lockpick tattoo on his finger, a black scarab tattoo on his neck, a Angstholm bloodmark tattoo on his leg, and a simple silver stud in his lip.
He has an old battle scar across his chest.
He is wearing a smooth peridot pickle charm, a delicate teardrop ruby pendant, a malachite-set white lily symbol, a crystal amulet, a light brown plush suede cloak, a blown glass lily symbol of swirled white and green, a silver and ruby mistletoe pin, a sephwir composite bow, a black leather back quiver inlaid with uncut emeralds, a studded-copper leather gnome-sized jack, a tarnished gnomish bracer, a twisted gold ring, a dark ale-stained sack clasped shut with a smooth onyx scarab, a slender midnight black steel lockpick case, some deep black silver-studded pants, a small locksmith's anklepouch, and some calf-high black leather boots.